I had beautiful, empowering, natural hospital based births… with both of my girls! And before I get into what I wish I had done differently, it can not be overstated that my experience is not necessarily the norm and I am incredibly grateful to have had the birthing experience I did… even if nothing were different.
However, nearly 8 years out from my first birth and 4 years into working exclusively in maternal and women’s health I have learned a lot and knowing what I know now, there are things I would absolutely have chosen to do differently had I had this knowledge then.
Additionally, I believe there are a few factors that stacked my cards in my favor for a positive hospital birthing experience that should be acknowledged.
First, I am so grateful I read “Expecting Better” by Emily Oster (Amazon link here). This book helped me make informed decisions about my birth and advocate for the birth I desired better than any book I have read. It is not for ALL moms, but for the right ones… aka the ones who are evidence focused and simply want the facts based on modern western oriented science… this should be your go to! That was me and it was so helpful!
Second, and one that can’t be understated yet also is not modifiable is the fact that I am a white woman with healthcare training. Those 2 simple fact unfortunately create an environment in which I am more likely to be listened to than if I were a minority without healthcare training. For this I am on one hand grateful and on the other deeply disturbed and discouraged by the state of our healthcare system.
Now on to what I would do differently with what I know now…
- Declining a bath for my baby. The benefits of maintaining the vernix on our babies is so convincing that I find it shocking that hospitals routinely vigorously wipe off and bathe our infants!
The vernix is the white, creamy, naturally occurring biofilm that helps moisturize baby’s skin and eases your baby’s adaptation to life outside the womb. It’s basically a protective coating that makes the transition into the world a little less jolting on their nervous system. Keep that vernix intact and decline bathing in water until your baby’s umbilical cord has fallen off! You baby, contrary to popular belief, doesn’t need to be bathed for upwards of 14 days or more.
- Dictating when my cord could be cut with directions that are not up for interpretation. I requested that I receive delayed cord clamping on my birth plan printout. I asked out loud that it be delayed. I received acknowledgement and what seemed like understanding. Then, my cord was cut mere minutes after delivery, generously it was 2-3min. Simply requesting delayed cord clamping is an instruction left up to interpretation. One person may consider a delay 30sec while I consider a delay over 30min. So in retrospect, I wish I had written, NO cord clamping until cord is white and with mother or father’s consent. I believe this more specific instruction would have safely ensured my baby got every last drop of those precious cord cells!
- Lastly, I wish someone had placed hot compresses on my perineum during the final stages of labor (~9-10cm dilation and while pushing). I have subsequently done this for several laboring women and they have all reported that it provided moderate to suberb relief. Midwives routinely provide this simple technique. So why is it so out of the norm for hospitals? Any nurse, doula or birth partner you may have should be able to and prepared to apply hot compresses when requested or simply to provide you some relief from the intense pressure sensations of birth.
**Of note, there is no significant evidence that hot compresses reduce the incidence of perineal tearing**
In Health,
Hilary
PS: If you are expecting and looking for a simple course on how to best prepare your body for birth, I invite you to check out my 90-min self paced course “Aligned with Birth”
CLICK HERE for details and to enroll.
